Thursday, May 7, 2009
Eminem "Relapse" Album Review
It's been five years since Eminem dropped his last lp "Encore", which was at most... meh. His most recent venture "Relapse" found it's way into my ipod today. Here's my review:
"Dr. West (Intro)" - Great intro. Scenario is of Marshall getting "great" advice upon his rehab release from his therapist. Sets up the next song lovely.
"3am" - The sequencing between the last track and this is perfect. I like this here better after I watched the video. Did Dre produce this? Only because I'm not mad at the production. At all. Plus, I'm digging the "Silence of the Lambs" reference. The horns, the keys, that dramatic foreboding tone is all there. Classic Em and Dre (?).
"My Mom" - Nigga, you ain't resolve any of those effin' issues with your moms yet? Em shares with us how effd up his childhood was and how he claims his moms introduced Valium and all other types of shit to him through his food. Marshall, for real, work that shit out or kill her already. This topic is as tired as it is listening to 40 year Jay still rapping about moving weight. Don't get me wrong, the song is somewhat decent, it's just we've been there and done done that already. No typo. Several times. I am firmly convinced that I don't ever wanna hear another song about Eminem's mom ever ever ever again.
"Insane" - Whoah!!! Em's rapping about how he was forced to suck on his uncle when he was a lil' kid? TMI!!! Anyways, this gem is laced with a tired ass sounding Dr. Dre(?) track. On the 2nd and 3rd verses, Em 's flow suddenly sounds like he's B-Real of Cyprus Hills fame. Meh.
"Bagpipes From Baghdad" - This is dope. If it were 1999 again. For 2009, not so much. Oh, he's dissing Mariah again? Why? Plus some shots at Nick Cannon. Dayum. Production sounds like an old Dr. Dre track. But not in a good way. Ah man. I don't think I'm liking where this album is going.
"Hello" - A really meh song trying really really hard to be a meh strip club banger. It succeeds in doing so.
"Tonya" - Another meh song about Em as a serial killer stalking Tanya, Lindsay and Britney. Poor them. Poor me too. There is absolutely zero amount of connect going on between this song and me.
"We Made You" -... fast forward to the next song. And quick!
"Medicine Ball" - Pretty good song, disgusting visuals though. And not that good to steer this cd from the train wreck that I'm foreseeing in the near future. Oh yeah, he fires some more shots at Christopher Reeves, whose been dead for years. What's the point?
"Paul (skit)" - Yet another skit with Em's manager Paul Rosenberg complaining about Em's choice of content and subject matter. He's also telling Em that Christopher Reeves has been dead for years. I'm wondering was he also complaining to Em about how shitty this album is sounding.
"Stay Wide Awake" - Great, another song about murder, and with buzzaws. ZZZZZZZZZ and meh.
"Old Times Sake feat. Dr. Dre" Uhm......................................
You know what? I'm a grown ass man with four kids, a mortgage, a beautiful wife who is wishing I spent less time on the keyboards, a close family member whose facing a potential life threatening disease and all other types of real life issues to deal with. FUCKOUTTA HERE! I'm not going through with the rest of this effin album. Not without getting paid. FUCK THAT. I have better shit to get into, and I deserve way better than this. And so do you. Stay away from this bitch!
On the strength of what I've heard and as extra credit for Eminem successfully undergoing a successful rehab, "Relapse" gets a 2 salutes out of 5 Combat Jack salutes.