Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Crispus Attucks Week: No Cage Fighting

See how the entire crowd is filled with white, screaming and shouting for blood? Not a good look for the light-skinted fellow jumping, hopping around like a lil dread locked Leprchaun

We all know how white LOVES to cage fight. White loves that shit so much that cage fights (along with all types of wrestling) are viewed as fun wholesome entertainment for the entire family. So much so even that cage fight events make for the perfect opportunity to take out the wife, kids, babies, grandma and dog included. Like a picnic even. Black and cage fights? Not so much. Not saying that Black ain't brawlic, but genetically, we aren't built for that type of sport. As the poor Black fellow in the above footage so clearly demonstrates, Black has no effin business whatsoever entering into any types of cage, especially when the word "fight" is somehow attached or connected to it. I'm guessing dudes' crew, consisting mainly of white, gassed him to step in the ring on account of him being all limber and shiny because of his capoeira skills. Not a good look. In celebration of Crispus Attucks week, whenever one of your white homies steps to you with the "Dude, the World Extreme Cage Fighting championships are in town!!! Me and the boys been watching you on the ball court and think you'd be perfect as a contender. Let's fucking get to it bro!!!" lingo, kindly reply, "Thanks Josh, but no thanks, I'm already locked in with my brother Jamel and his friends to attend the local ghetto strip club, solely for the purpose of throwing hundreds of dollars of my hard earned money into the air, at scantily clad women, just on GP and in order to look cool." In other words, just say no.


  1. Me = The White
    Me = NOT cage fighting

    One time I had to go out to Queens to see that Capa-whatever (I was dating an actress at the time and her friend was dating a dude... nevermind). Anyway, Capa-crap is NOT a fighting style, it's what the nerds did the cafeteria after the monitors took their fake swords away.

  2. Don't front on capoeira.. Yoruban cats who are really nice with it can really fuck you up -no tekken. That said, that fight reminds me of Indian Jones when that dude runs up in his face doing all the fancy sword-work shit and Indy just shoots him dead. hilarious.

  3. You are right againg CJ this sport is dominated by white guys. They like that pain shit and they get 100 tattoos and piercings so you have to beat them for 5 rounds to drop one.
    Rampage lost on a decision and kimbo slice got knocked the fuckout when he stopped fighting hobos for grilled cheese sandwiches and faced a real fighter in the ring. There is a black guy who is undefeated in the ufc named rashad evans but he will lose one day because that just isnt our strongest sport. Tiger woods is the greatest golfer of all time but now there are less blacks on tour than when he started.

  4. ummm, MMA is actually well-represented with Black folks. Anyone ever heard of Rashad Evans or Rampage Jackson?!

    By the way, the above clip was a movie scene-a movie. HEre's the real, watch this instead.