Combat Jack With Today's Mathematics

So word on the Internets is that I fell off because I cut back on my standard 2000 word posts, which, I guess, is what keeps a bunch of ya'll coming back. Or I fell off on account of how I stopped dropping behind the scenes stories about my days as an attorney in the music industry. Or how I don't really get personal about my daily life anymore. The homie Dallas was like, "CJ, how could you fall off if you ain't never been on yet? Still nigga, you need to feed the beast" I hear him though. Especially since that Vibe Top 50 Blogs list clearly put me in my place. Heh. But yeah, I admit, I did fall back on them long ass posts. Maybe because them shits is hard as hell to keep dropping day after effin day. And for free too. Plus, there's days that I wake up realizing that I don't have shit to write about. Or how some of my industry stories might either be too revealing or too boring for you. But, still and all, I'm a firm believer in giving the people what they want. So I'ma wing this one on some free association ish, you know, go with the flow. Hope you like it.

Secret Wars



















Back around '92, '93, there was a secret war going on between LL Cool J and Jay-Z. At the time, LL was sitting on top of the world, especially after he dropped his classic "Mama Said Knock You Out" LP, which was bonkers. LL was untouchable, having earned the title of being a battle rapper as well. Jay-Z, Dame Dash and Clark Kent was on the hunt though. No one was effin with then with regard to giving Jay a shot as a credible artist and they figured if Jay was known as the dude that kilt LL in battle, record labels would take note and give him that much sought after deal. Dame and Clark had the plan laid out, whenever LL was spotted by either of them, they would page each other and Jay and get him to meet at whatever location LL was. This went on a couple of times. Once contacted, Jay would roll up to the club, bar or whatever venue and lay in the cut, waiting for his opportunity to attack LL in battle. Dame would polly with, then taunt LL about how Jay was nicer than him, was ready to take his spot even. LL's ego would result in him agreeing to go head to head against the young and then unknown challenger. They would take the battle to the parking lot, outside of the venues and away from the crowds. And battle they would. Dame and Clark would end up in my office the following day, laughing about how Jay lit that ass up. Every time too. They was a bit sour too, cause after each battle, LL would kill the vibe, crush Jay's high by flinging the "yo, my next record is dropping next month, uhm, when's yours coming out again, scrap?" line at him. Jay, Dame and Clark didn't like that shit. Not one bit. I'm betting those battles are the reason LL is still kinda aggie towards Jay. Don't let his words fool you. Since I was never physically present at any of these "secret wars", I stay begging Clark to let me interview him about those battles for one of my drops. He stays telling me no. I feel I'ma land that soon though. Soon.

Clark Kent and Japan























I met Clark through Damon Dash. I think we were at a Das-Efx recording session at some studio. Around that time, I was dating this artsy chick named Angela, you might of heard of her. Anyways, Angela had picked up a pair of cowboy boots for me. Said I was rocking the Timbs way too much. The first day I rocked them was when I went to the studio and met Clark. The minute we met, Clark started going the eff off on me on how I wasn't a real Brooklyn cat, and a Black dude rocking cowboy boots was the corniest type of knicca walking the planet and all other types of abuse. I was heated as shit about how dude mouthed off, still, I was a professional there to do business and kept it moving. Clark is one of the most opinionated dudes I know. Anyways, we ended up doing so many deals together and grew to respect each other to the point that I'm most definitely sure that he forgot that it was me that he insulted on that fateful day.

Anyways, I ended up doing this one deal where this Japanese company hired Clark to judge a DJ contest in Tokyo, Japan. All expense paid trip, with accommodations at the TOP four star hotel at the time. Clark made sure we negotiated for two tickets as Damon Dash, still a new jack in the game, wanted to experience Japan in all it's glory. So I close the deal, and Clark and Dame are prepped to go. Like three days before their trip, Clark calls me and lets me know that since Damon at the time had never been out of the country, he didn't have a passport, and there was no effin way he was going to be able to get on a plane headed for the far east. Because I had mine, he asked me if I minded taking Dame's place. B, my bags were packed with the quickness.

So after a 14 hour flight we land in Tokyo. It's a Friday night and we instantly hit some clubs. The Japanese treated Clark like he was a god, especially since his skills as a DJ was a thing of legend to them. Naturally, the Japanese chicks were all over dude. At the end of the night, we ended up taking two chicks back to the hotel. All while in the cab, then the lobby, then in our separate hotel rooms, communication between us and the chicks was kinda comical, kinda difficult since Clark and I didn't speak a lick of Japanese and the chicks didn't speak a word of Engrish. Clark and I ended up smashing them broads though. Funny shit is the next morning, when we all reconvened for breakfast, right when we were about to part ways with our new friends from the Orient, one of the broads says in her best broken English: "your hotel much better than De La Soul". Clark and I were speechless.

Sonia

Angela didn't break my heart, she just turned out to be nuts, and when it ended, I was relieved that it was over. Sonia did though. I was at a party down in the Wall Street area. She was there too. A real cute "thick-thin" fair skinned honey with a short cut. A Black girl with natural Blonde hair. Maybe it was her smile. Or the green eyes. Or the way she rocked the Timbs and how they looked with her cut-off shorts. We talked briefly. She said she was a lawyer too. Ah man homie, shit was too perfect. She lived in DC but her best friend was a well known video director who lived in New York and she would come up to the city every week. After the party, I walked her out. The summer night was filled with magic, especially when I saw how she filled her shorts. My game was on point too. Her whole presence had me on bold mode, and I was most definitely focused on the win. I played her mad close, walking circles around her like lion to prey. She loved being preyed upon too. Unfortunately, she had to get ready for her drive back to DC early the next morning. She walked up to her Jeep (tm) and right before she hopped in, she kissed me lightly on my cheek. GOD DAMN, I was open.

You already know how I did it, mad calls one the phone, long distance too. My name in the music game was starting to spread, but my paper was still kinda short. Sonia came from money though. Her pops was on the executive board of some major tobacco company. She grew up in some mansion type home in Connecticut. Even though her family was kind of conservative, Sonia had a rebellious side, she wanted to walk a bit on the wild side. At the time, I was mad cut, I stayed in the gym 24/7 and my shit was 5%/10% body fat. Plus, I stayed in the streets, in the clubs, in the studios, looking for that next star of a client, or that next broad to smash.

Every other weekend, she'd come to Brooklyn or I'd drive to DC. I fronted too. One of my boys Norm, made a shitload of money working on tours with acts like Whitney Houston, Guy and Jodeci. On weekends when he had to fly out of town, he'd automatically toss me keys to his Benz. Whenever Sonia came to NY, or I'd drive to DC, I stayed in the Benz. She knew I had chicks on the side, and I knew she was seeing other cats too. That was the word on the street, how she stayed playing lesser negroes. But our chemistry was right. Her favorite drink was my favorite as well, and when we drank Tequila together, we'd always end up falling way deep inside each other.

There was a couple of times when Sonia was scheduled to come to Brooklyn, when I would miss her call. I didn't have a cell phone then. I'd get home and check my answering machine. I'd hear her message, that she was in Brooklyn, and that we'd connect before the weekend was over. The times that I missed her though, I wouldn't hear from her until like Sunday night, right before she would leave, headed back to DC. Hmmmm. I deduced that she was either hanging out with her girl, the video director and that they didn't need me as a third wheel, or that another nigga from Brooklyn had peeped her style, had found a way to snatch her precious time from me. I knew Sonia played the game well, but damn, in my hometown. I wasn't jealous, we both sized each other up and knew what kind of person we'd be effin with. In fact, her boldness made me like her style that much more. Plus, I was confident that the other cat wasn't giving her what I was, he wasn't giving her what she needed.

We took a trip to the country of Jamaica. Away from the states, our work, her other Brooklyn lover. Man, the open that I felt when I met her intensified. Even though I laughed inside at what the other dude in Brooklyn was missing, what I had all to myself that week, I wasn't too cool with having to share her once we got back to the States. As we were laying in bed, overlooking the ocean view, she initiated the issue. "I have to tell you something, you know I date other people, right?" I told her I knew. Then I carefully cornered her, "I know you're effin with a Brooklyn dude too." Still playing the game, I could tell she dug they way I put the pieces together. I went in "You know, I'm really feeling you, and that Brooklyn dude, you might want to cut that out right now. I know how you and me do Sonia, and we're only going to end up hurting that other dude's feelings. So I'm ready to cut my birds loose for you, for real." She told me she wasn't ready to do that. She then proceeded to tell me who the other dude was. Said she "had" to tell me who he was. When she did, I was stunned, insulted too. Dude was a well known film cat who had mad paper, but pound for pound, he wasn't effin with the rest of my attributes. I let her have it "if you're effin with dude, you know it's only for the money, because there's no way he has ANYTHING on me!" She claimed she was "torn". I laughed it off, and decided to keep it moving. No way was I gonna ruin the mood of our trip. I knew that eventually she would see the error of her ways, especially since I knew how corney the other dude was. Our last couple of days in Jamaica, I made sure to put it down extra heavy, for good measure and just on gp.

A week after we got back, me to New York and she to DC, this other dude releases the BIGGEST movie of his effin career. I open up a copy of the Daily News, I see a picture of Sonia standing next to him at the screening. I'm on the train and the lady sitting next to me is flipping through a copy of People magazine when I spot a picture of them together. I'm hanging with my boys watching the game and all I'm seeing sitting court side is Sonia and this nigga!!!!! Once again, I'm getting joked out by my crew.

Now Sonia and dude become a public couple, but she's still calling me and now on the low. Now she's sneaking to my place for the back shot. Problem is, I'm not with it no more. No way I'm creeping behind that corney ass dude. Eventually, I had to break it off. Dude had edged me out as he was now that main cat and I was on the side. The last conversation we had, she was mad at me for not wanting to continue our thing. I liked it how mad she sounded, the last bit of satisfaction I was able to get out of the whole scenario, knowing she was mad at me cutting her off from what the film cat could never bring. Be it ego or pride or both, I didn't have it in me to move forward. That was years ago. She and dude ended up getting happily married. I still see them in the news from time to time. She's seen me an wifey too. When she first saw her, I glimpsed some of that jealousy pop up. That's what beautiful women do when matched by a beautiful woman. And wifey stays a dime after 12 years and four kids together. In the long run, I lucked out and ended up with just the right one.









Wifey

Blogging

I wish I could write as well as Byron Crawford. Not the hate, that's just his lane, his gimmick, I'm talking about his style, not only the words, but the way he dissects topics and switches to the next issue, then wrapping up his drops perfectly. In my opinion, pound for pound, he's the best writer in the game. I'd hate to have to go pen for pen against dude. I'd go for it though, go for it with gusto, just hoping it never happens.

Dallas Penn is, or at least I believe, my best friend who blogs. That dude's way is some kind of magic, like the only blogger in the world who doesn't get hated on. He's like the magical negro blogger, but without the coonery. It really does feel like he's my brother from another borough. Dude has been in my house breaking bread with me, wifey and the kids. Not only is his future getting brighter by the moment, but I truly believe once we stop bullshitting and eventually team up on some project, we will effin kill the game. Dallas, I'm waiting on you homie.

Still trying to figure out how Eskay stays making all of that money. Not to get in dude's pocket, but the street estimate in terms of what he makes is what I want to make doing this shit. Soon too. I'm impressed by his game. Not mad at his game at all.

This blogging shit is really addictive. Not to take anything away from rappers, from emcees, but whenever I get to writing, really writing, I feel like how a rapper must feel when they think they just spit some hot fiyah. Maybe I'm delusional, but bloggers are the new rappers. And I spit hot fiyah. I'm also starting to see bits of hate coming from some of my fellow bloggers. It's all good though. I'm learning that words are powerful, especially when amplified through the power of technology. If you notice, I'm throwing fewer people under the bus than I did when I started out four years ago. I'm not trying bring no types of bs to my life, I'm only in this shit for the win!